Get ready to laugh your abs off with these hilarious gym humor quotes.
Going to the gym and working out is not fun, right? While workout and fitness activities, having a sense of humor can definitely make the mood lighter.
We’ve gathered some of the funniest workout sayings that will make you laugh whenever you hit the gym. They will make you smile and motivate you to keep moving, whether you love the gym or not.
These funny quotes from famous athletes and unknown authors about gym humor make fun of what happens in the weight room.
Go ahead and read them! don’t laugh so hard you pull a muscle.
Funniest Gym Workout Quotes Of All Time
“I’m not into working out. My philosophy: No pain, no gain. Sorry, I meant: No pain, no pain.” – Carol Leifer
“Exercise is a dirty word. Every time I hear it, I wash my mouth out with chocolate.” – Charles M. Schulz
“My idea of exercise is a good brisk sit.” – Phyllis Diller
“Do more of what makes you happy. Unless it’s burpees. Never do more burpees.” – Betches
“I hate when the fitness trainer says, ‘Feel the burn!’ I’m like, ‘No thanks, I already have heartburn from this pre-workout snack.'” – Chris Scott
“I have to exercise in the morning before my brain figures out what I’m doing.” – Marsha Doble
“I got 99 problems, but i’m going to the gym to ignore all of them.”—unknown
“Every morning I break my personal record for most consecutive days getting out of bed.” – Jim Gaffigan
“I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.” – Fred Allen
“I don’t stop when I’m tired. I stop when I’m done. Or when I decide I don’t want be fat anymore but cookies.” – Chrissy Teigen
“The only exercise I excel at is jumping to conclusions.” – James Nathan Miller
“I’m not into working out. My philosophy: No pain, no gain. Sorry, I meant: No pain, no pain.” – Carol Leifer
“I love when people at the gym aggressively clipboard and walk around with serious faces. We get it, you do business here.” – Jimmy Fallon
“Me at the gym vs. me with pizza. A never-ending internal battle.” – Unknown
“I’m not shopping for workout clothes. I’m shopping for clothes that make me look like I work out.” – Sara Benincasa
“I bet I could squat more if the Smith Machine had a happy hour.” – Ellen DeGeneres
“I don’t know what reps I did last time so I’ll just wing it. What’s the worst that could happen?” – Rob Delaney
“My Favorite Machine At The Gym Is My Smartphone”—unknown
“My Apple Watch: It looks like you started an outdoor walk 35 minutes ago. Me: That wasn’t a walk, that was just me struggling to find parking.” – Randy Rainbow
“Inside me is a thin woman trying to get out. I usually shut her up with chocolate.” – Unknown
“The first time I see a jogger smiling, I’ll consider it.” – Joan Rivers
“I have to exercise early in the morning before my brain figures out what I’m doing.” – Marsha Doble
“My favorite machine at the gym is the vending machine.” – Caroline Rhea
“If God had wanted me to bend over, he would have put diamonds on the floor.” – Joan Rivers
“My favorite exercise at the gym would probably be judging.” – Unknown
“I spend about half my time at the gym wondering why I’m not getting results and the other half checking my phone.” – Unknown
“Life has its ups and downs. we call them squats.”—unknown
“I don’t get why people pay to exercise in a GYM when it’s FREE to not exercise.” – Bridger Winegar
“The only exercise I get is running out of money.” – Unknown
“I like to multitask and do my cardio while I’m eating.” – Unknown
“There’s no secret formula. I lift heavy, work hard, and aim to be the best.” – Ronnie Coleman, professional bodybuilder
“The most annoying are those people in exceptionally good shape at the gym. I’m like, ‘What are you doing here? You’re done.'” – Jim Gaffigan
“I’m on that new diet where you eat everything and pray for a miracle.” – Unknown
“You know you’re old when your back goes out more than you do.” – Phyllis Diller
“I don’t believe in jogging. It extends your life but by about the same amount of time you spend jogging.” – Marshall Brickman
“I really don’t think I need buns of steel. I’d be perfectly happy with buns of cinnamon.” – Ellen DeGeneres
“I have flabby thighs, but fortunately, my stomach covers them.” – Joan Rivers
“Going to the gym is the best way to stay fit. Leaving the gym is the best way to stay sane.” – Unknown
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Funny Exercise & Workout Quotes
I wear black to the gym because it’s like a funeral for my fat.
I have a love-hate relationship with Leg Day.
My gym is like a nightclub. I don’t go there.
Remember, Rome wasn’t built in a day. But I wasn’t on that particular job.
I’m in a good place right now. Not emotionally; I’m just at the gym.
Fitness tip: if you can’t pronounce it, you shouldn’t lift it.
I don’t sweat, I sparkle!
The only running I do is running out of money for my gym membership.
I would rather not look skinny. I want to look like I could survive a zombie apocalypse.
My favorite exercise at the gym would probably be judging.
I thought ‘clean eating’ was devouring cupcakes while mopping the floor.
Why do they call it a gym? I thought it was a ‘judgment-free zone.’
I’m allergic to the gym. I break out in a sweat every time.
Gym rule #1: If you want to know the correct exercise method, the answer is: Whatever hurts most.
I go to the gym because I think my great personality could use a banging body.
I consider my refusal to go to the gym today as resistance training.
When I asked where the wine bar was, the gym looked at me funny.
Squat because nobody ever wrote a song about a small butt.
Does refusing to go to the gym count as resistance training?
I’m not into working out. My philosophy: No pain, no pain.
If you still look cute after the gym, you didn’t work out hard enough.
I lift weights, but mostly my spirits.
My abs are like my favorite book: hidden under a cover.
The only six-pack I have is in the fridge.
Exercise? I thought you said extra fries!
I have two speeds at the gym: slow and stop.
My gym trainer says I should eat more greens. I said, ‘I already have green M&Ms, isn’t that enough?’
Fitness is like a relationship. You can’t cheat and expect it to work.
Workout Excuse Funny Quotes
“I’m not lazy, I’m just on energy-saving mode.”
“My inner voice during a workout: ‘This is awful! Why are you doing this? I hate this! Quit now!’ Me: ‘Shut up and keep moving!'”
“I’m not sure what’s harder, the workout or trying to pronounce all the exercises.”
“Excuses will not kill fat; exercise will.”
“I’m on a seafood diet. I see food, and I eat it.”
“I’ll start my diet tomorrow…after I eat this donut.”
“Life has its ups and downs, but my workout will always be up. And down. And up again.”
“I feel like I compete with myself to see who can devise the most creative excuses not to work out.”
“The only thing more exhausting than the workout is the walk to the gym.”
“I’m not sure why I pay for a gym membership. I spend most of my time there looking for a parking spot.”
“My love for food is only surpassed by my love for sleep.” – Unknown
“I’m not sure what’s more painful, the workout itself or the guilt I feel when I skip it.”
“I’m not sure what’s harder, the workout or trying to look like I know what I’m doing.”
“Still looking cute after your workout? You probably didn’t push yourself hard enough.”
“The only thing worse than a burpee is a burpee competition.” – Unknown
“I’m not sure why I torture myself like this. Oh yeah, that’s right, for the endorphins!”
“I’m not addicted to the gym… I can quit anytime…but I won’t.”
“Pain is temporary; pizza is forever.”
“Don’t be afraid to sweat. It’s just your fat crying.”
“Unless you puke, faint, or die, keep going!”
“I’m not sure what’s more inspiring, the before and after pictures or the free pizza they serve on Fridays.”
To Stay Motivated: 150+ Gym Workout Motivational Quotes To Stay Fit
Short Funny Gym Saying
- I’m not lazy; I’m on energy-saving mode. 🔋
- Sweat now, selfie later. 💪🤳
- Gym hair, I don’t care. 😅💁
- I just crushed my workout, and now I’m ready to crush some tacos. 🌮
- Squats? I thought you said shots. 🍹
- I wear black to the gym because it’s a funeral for my fat. ⚰️
- I’m in a committed relationship with my gym. We’re on-again, off-again. 😏
- Muscles loading… please wait. 🔄💪
- Does refusing to run count as resistance training? 🚫🏃♂️
- I’m doing this for me and pizza. 🍕❤️
- I don’t sweat; I sparkle. ✨
- My gym buddy is my willpower. 🧠💪
- My abs might be hiding, but they’re there. 🙈
- This workout is sponsored by sheer willpower. 😤
- Workout? I thought you said takeout. 🍟
- Squat because no one raps about little butts. 🍑
- I like my weights heavy and my squats low. 🏋️♂️
- I came. I saw. I did a half-assed workout. 🤷♂️
- Exercise? I thought you said extra rice. 🍚
- I followed my heart and it led me to the gym. And then to the donut shop. 🍩
- I’m just here for the post-workout snack. 🥪
- I’m trying to get that ‘I workout’ look without the workout. 😎
- Gym Rule: If no one saw it, it didn’t happen. 🤫
- I’m feeling the burn and it’s not from my workout. 🔥
- Cardio? Is that Spanish for more chips? 🍟
- I don’t always work out, but I expect immediate results when I do. 🏋️♀️
- Working on my six pack, one beer at a time. 🍺
- Why lift when you can stretch in the yoga area? 🧘♀️
- Gym imitation is real, but so is cake. 🍰
- My workout routine: Flexing my smile muscles. 😄
Funny Fitness Sayings
- My running style is best described as startled gazelle.
- I consider ‘On your left!’ to be my personal motivational speaker
- I do yoga to relieve stress. Just kidding, I drink wine in yoga pants.
- Fitness Tip: Stretching is crucial. Stretch out flat on your back. Stretch your eyelids over your eyes. Stretch a blanket over your body.
- Be the kind of person that when your feet hit the floor in the morning, the devil says, ‘Oh no, they’re up!’
- I’m into cross-training. I cross my fingers and hope my body can train itself.
- You know you’re a runner when ‘a short run’ is anything under 6 miles
- They say the best exercise is to reach down and pull somebody else up
- My favorite exercise is a cross between a lunge and a crunch. I call it lunch.
- Abs are great, but have you tried donuts?
- If you still look cute after working out, you didn’t train hard enough
- I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me
- The most effective ab exercise is the one you do just before entering a pool
- I lift weights, but I also lift tacos to my mouth
- Remember, it’s not a sprint. It’s a never-ending marathon of avoidant maneuvers.
- I’m in shape. Round is a shape, isn’t it?
- Sweating at the gym and rethinking all my life decisions that led me here
- The only running I do is to run out of money
- I don’t believe in personal trainers. I believe in personally training myself to reach the remote without getting up.
- Exercise? I thought you said extra slice.
- My abs could be more defined if they weren’t playing hide and seek.
- Why do they call it a gym? I thought it was a ‘judgment-free zone.
- My fitness coach told me to bend over and touch my toes. I replied, “I don’t have that kind of relationship with my feet.
- Calories don’t count if you eat in your workout clothes.
- Squats are like life. It’s about standing up when something heavy tries to keep you down.
- I need to exercise. My body is like a temple—a temple of doom.
- I hope one day, my weak arms will be strong enough to carry all my shopping bags.
- My abs are like my favorite TV show; they’re hidden under a cover
- My workout routine: Flexing my smile muscles
- My favorite machine at the gym is the vending machine.
- I like my workouts like I like my coffee: I wouldn’t say I like coffee.
- I have a six-pack. It’s just hiding under the protective layer of fluff.
- Calories don’t count if you eat them in your gym clothes
- When I asked where the wine bars were, the gym looked at me funny.
- I’m not running away from my problems; I’m doing laps around them.
- I don’t chase people; I chase pizza.
- The only six-pack I want is beer.
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Funny Gym Workout and Fitness Slogans
I lift the pizza to my mouth. |
I don’t sweat, I sparkle. |
Burpees? I thought you said slurpees. |
Exercise? I thought you said extra fries. |
I am sweating like a pig, feeling like a fox. |
Gym is my new boyfriend. |
Squat now, wine later. |
I work out so I can eat garbage. |
Abs are made in the gym, and covered in the kitchen. |
Fitness freak with an eating streak. |
Run like your phone is at 1%. |
I have abs. They’re just shy. |
I flexed, and the sleeves fell off. |
I’m into fitness. Fit’ness whole cake in my mouth. |
Why run when you can walk to the fridge? |
Be stronger than your strongest excuse. |
Six-pack in progress. |
Training to be a badass. |
I thought they said rum. |
Sweating out the stress. |
Dear fat, prepare to die. |
Running from my problems. |
Yoga: because punching people is frowned upon. |
I run because I really like food. |
I am running from my problems. |
No pain, no cake. |
Fitness freak with an eating streak. |
I’m in a good place right now. Not emotionally, just in the gym. |
Running… because zombies will eat the untrained ones. |
Cardio? Is that Spanish for more cake? |
Motivational Fitness Humor
- If you still look cute after working out, you didn’t try hard enough. 💪🚫
- Our bodies are capable of anything… It’s our minds we have to convince. 🧠✨
- Don’t stop when you’re tired. Stop when you’re done. 🏋️♂️🏁
- What seems impossible today will one day become your warm-up. 🤸♂️🔥
- I only work out because I really, really like donuts. 🍩💪
- Sweat is just fat crying. Keep it weeping! 😭💦
- Remember, it’s not about having time but making time. ⏰💪
- The only bad workout is the one that didn’t happen. 🏃♀️❌
- Fall in love with taking care of your body. It’s the only place you have to live. 🏠❤️
- Eat clean, train dirty. 🥦💥
- Fitness is like a relationship. You can’t cheat and expect it to work. 💔🏋️♀️
- I’m not sweating; I’m just melting my fat away. 🌞💦
- Be stronger than your excuses. 🚫🛌
- Train insane or remain the same. 🤪🔄
- Dear muscles, I’m sorry for the pain, but I love your gains. 💕💪
- Every workout should end in “I’ll be sore tomorrow.” 📆😖
- Sore? Tired? Out of breath? Good… it’s working. 😤✔️
- I’m not running from my problems but towards my solution. 🏃♀️🎯
- Your workout is my warm-up. 🔥👟
- Rise and grind. The coffee and your workout! ☕🏋️♂️
- Push yourself because no one else is going to do it for you. 👊🙅♂️
- The only time you should ever look back is to see how far you’ve come. 🔄👀
- Train like a beast, look like a beauty. 🐾💅
- Excuses don’t burn calories. 🚫🔥
- Your comfort zone is a beautiful place, but nothing ever grows there. 🌱🚷
- Don’t wish for it; work for it. 🌠🏋️
- I bend so I don’t break. 🧘♀️💔
- Better sore than sorry. 😓👍
- Sweat, smile, and repeat. 😄💦🔄
- Strong is the new sexy. 💪😎
- I’m not here to be average; I’m here to be awesome. 🌟👊
- You don’t get the butt you want by sitting on it. 🍑🛋️
- My gym is my therapy. 🧘♂️💆♀️
- Pain is temporary, but pride is forever. 😖🏆
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Funny Diet and Fitness Quotes
“Abs are made in the kitchen, but wine is made in the kitchen too, so…” – Unknown
“I only work out because I really, really like donuts.” – Unknown
“I work out because I love chocolate.” – Unknown
“I’m on a seafood diet. I see food, and I eat it.” – Unknown
“I’m not addicted to exercise…I can quit anytime…but I won’t.” – Unknown
“My love for food is only surpassed by my love for sleep.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying I’m lazy, but I once went to the gym and just sat there while looking at the weights.” – Unknown
“I’m not sure what’s harder, the workout or trying to pronounce all the exercises.” – Unknown
“My inner voice during a workout: ‘This is awful! Why are you doing this? I hate this! Quit now!’ Me: ‘Shut up and keep moving!'” – Unknown
“The only thing worse than a burpee is a burpee competition.” – Unknown
“Running is cheaper than therapy.” – Unknown
“Gym hair, don’t care.” – Unknown
“Still looking cute after your workout? You probably didn’t push yourself hard enough.” – Unknown
“I’m not sure why I pay for a gym membership. I spend most of my time there looking for a parking spot.” – Unknown
“I’m not sure what’s more painful, the workout itself or the guilt I feel when I skip it.” – Unknown
“I feel like I’m in a competition with myself to see who can come up with the most creative excuses not to work out.” – Unknown
“The only thing more exhausting than the workout is the walk to the gym.” – Unknown
“I’m not sure why I torture myself like this. Oh yeah, that’s right, for the endorphins!” – Unknown
“I’m not sure what’s more inspiring, the before and after pictures or the free pizza they serve on Fridays.” – Unknown
“Pain is temporary, pizza is forever.” – Unknown
“Don’t be afraid to sweat. It’s just your fat crying.” – Unknown
“Unless you puke, faint, or die, keep going!” – Unknown
“I’m not here to talk; I’m here to lift.” – Arnold Schwarzenegger
“If you can’t handle me at my worst, you don’t deserve me at my strongest. Especially after leg day.” – Unknown
“I’m not sure why I bother working out. I could just eat salad all the time and look the same.” – Unknown
“I’m not sure what’s more embarrassing, falling off the treadmill or realizing everyone saw it.” – Unknown
“My workout routine is like my diet: I start strong and then gradually lose interest.” – Unknown
“I’m not sure what I hate more, burpees or lunges. They’re both equally terrible.” – Unknown
“I’m not sure why I even try to eat healthy. I always end up craving pizza or ice cream.” – Unknown
“My fitness tracker says I’ve walked 10,000 steps today. I’m pretty sure half of those were just me walking to the fridge.” – Unknown
Conclusion
When physical fitness becomes a burden, keeping a sense of humor and getting stronger and healthier is helpful.
I hope this list of funny gym quotes, captions, and fitness humor gave you a good laugh and made working out seem a little less boring.
Laughter can be good for your health. It can make you feel better, reduce stress, and unite people.
So feel free to joke about the journey toward better health.
What other funny or relatable fitness quotes make you laugh? Share your favorites in the comments below!
Manish is a NASM-certified fitness and nutrition coach with over 10 years of experience in weight lifting and fat loss fitness coaching. He specializes in gym-based training and has a lot of knowledge about exercise, lifting technique, biomechanics, and more.
Through “Fit Life Regime,” he generously shares the insights he’s gained over a decade in the field. His goal is to equip others with the knowledge to start their own fitness journey.